the inside scoop...behind the scenes in the life of Amy.  
 
Life for me these days has been like doing the hula hoop, you've just gotta keep on trying! Thats not to say this has been a bad time, in fact the contrary is true. This has been a season of growth, honesty and resolution. Funny enough, in October of 2008 one of my more prophetic leaders was praying for me and what the Lord was speaking was something like, 'You're in a dry season, but you'll find gold if you look for it'. Rather cryptic I thought, since that season had not yet begun! But as the last 6 months has progressed, that season came upon me. These are the challenging times, where our hunger is put to the test and our frailty is too intrusive for comfort! This season mostly came through bouts of sickness and questions of call and capability. I found myself with all my chips on the table, in a crazy enough state to bet it all. God kept asking me, "How hungry are you Amy? How hungry are you?" It seemed quite taunting at the time, but it put a fire under my butt to ask some hard questions. I get rather dramatic during these situations in life, my normal rational self gets benched and I fight like crazy until I reach some kind of conclusion. I see this as a strength and a weakness! My favorite scripture in the Bible is in Luke 12 where Jesus tells us, "Fear not, little flock, for it is your Fathers good pleasure to give you the Kingdom, sell all that you have and give alms, provide for yourselves bags which wax not old, a treasure in the heavens that fails not, where no thief approaches and no moths corrupt, for where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." To me there is something amazing about this type of treasure, and my hope is that my treasure would always be Jesus himself and no other could replace Him. The new understanding this time in life has brought is that not only is He our treasure, but we are His. Many times during my sickness and recovery I pondered about suffering and thought about extreme cases in the Nations of suffering, violence, poverty & exploitation, asking the Lord about individual people & situations. It would be outrageous if I said I have the answer to why these things are happening in our world, but I do know one thing. That regardless of situation, that treasure is the only secure and predictable resource we have, and if He is not our treasure, than what we hold onto will wax old & fail. I've seen in a new way and been refreshed that this Love is only after us & our affection. The great mystery is, this God actually receives and cherishes our response to His offer. We could stand in no higher place.